So You Know.

It seems like my most frequent and widely used topic on this blog is the general update post. I apologize that I'm not "bringin' the content" like a blogmaster, but things in the real world have been rather pressing, and generally more important, than the virtual world I often inhabit.

One of my closest friends got married last weekend in a ceremony I can only conclude as being the most wonderful I've ever been a part of. There are, in fact, parts of it that I am going to graciously rob for my own ceremony - when and if the Lord draws me close to my earthly bride.

This week was a bit something. My grandfather took a turn for the worse (he had been fighting Parkinson's disease for as long as I think I've been alive). He ended that fight yesterday morning. My mother had been there since Monday - and came home last night to give me a birthday blessing and a song with my cake. She was also able to rest a bit before her and my dad left this afternoon. I leave Sunday morning for visitation that afternoon; the funeral takes place Monday.

(For those concerned, the family has great peace about the situation - a true blessing from God).

My thanks to everyone who continues to come here...I will try to put aside some time for more content - something that is really on my heart, but a bit far from action. To those I know personally, I'll see you soon and we can have some good talks over coffee or something. To everyone else - thanks for tuning in. Until next time, I imagine.

I Don't Know You.

But I wish I did. It would be amazing for us to spend more time together. To get to know each other more intimately. To create, nurture, and grow an amazing friendship. To experience life together. To be part of each other's joy. To share the burdens of this life as one.

Unfortunately, most of you out there are complete strangers to me. I know you because you stumble across this blog, for a second or maybe longer. We don't get a chance to talk - to communicate to each other apart from the one-sided story you read about on this page. And it's such a horrible story, I promise you. I am not all that interesting, and the words I speak rarely (if ever) amount to anything extraordinary. But, in real life - we would have nothing to hide. You'd see me for who I am, heights and depths. We could be real - we could take that time to be real.

What's worse...there's a lot of people who read this that I actually do know. We've been friends for quite some time. We have experienced moments in life together. I work with some of you on a daily basis. Where are the walls between us coming from? I apologize for the construction on my end - but I think it's time to tear them down. I want to spend every second we might have together doing just what we were created for - loving God and loving each other. Let us spend more time talking, building one another up in love. Let us set aside whatever it is that hinders us and take a journey. A long one. A short one. Any one.

There is a God of this universe, of all things, and His love for us blows my mind. If it were possible, to understand, I think it could possibly vaporize me. Poof. Thin air. Gone.

Let's get together sometime and marvel at God. Let's be truthful and honest about our hearts. Let's be gentle and nurturing with our responses. It's time to be transparent and vulnerable. What are we so scared of?

I am amazed by how much Jesus loves me. I am amazed by how much I am able to love Him back. He loves you with the same ferociousness. Oh, how I wish you knew and could see that. I wish we could all run with that promise wrapped around us.

I'll talk to you soon. Come say "Hello" to me. E-mail me. Comment. I'm going to fail you - because I am imperfect. But I am 100% ready to try not to.

In Lieu Of More Writing:

Since I missed last night's update, and also the day before that, I think I might just go ahead and do my Ichthus awards instead of a long, drawn out analysis of every hour of each day. So, without further ado:

The 2006 Ichthus Festival Awards:

Best Performance: (Tie) - Staple/Kids in the Way. Although my friend Joe would ultimately put Staple at the top, the KITW set was grand - with new songs and a lot of energy and emotion. Staple did a magnificent job, as always...and since it is probably the last time I will ever see them live (due to their disbanding) it also gains more points (not that it needed them).

Best Breakout Band (i.e. Best New Band I'm Listening to Now): The Myriad. These guys were pretty awesome. The entire set was great. The CD is great. I am thoroughly looking forward to seeing them again.

Honorable Mention (to above): Cool Hand Luke. I already owned their CD, so it counts a bit less than above - but it was awesome to see these guys. Totally not what I was expecting (in a really, really good way).

Happiest Moment: Jumping up and down (and all around) during Delirious' rendition of Holy Is the Lord.

Most Painful: Walking miles into the festival each day because I didn't want to fight traffic (and had fooled myself into believing it wouldn't be that bad of a journey).

Deepest Moment: Seventh Day Slumber. I had heard a lot about the band, and a lot about their heart for ministry, altar calls, and just overall nature. More affecting than the main keynote message I heard (on living a life filled/ruled by the Spirit - which was also amazing). I feel like God really uses (and I pray used, for Ichthus) that band.

Since I can't really think of any more categories I'll just finish this up now. The whole weekend was great. A lot of amazing bands, and even greater chance encounters with God (it was funny to meet Him there, knowing my heart/mindset going into the festival).

Oh, and working today (in exchange for my weekend wristlock) was an amazing and super-fun experience. I'm thinking about doing it again next year, and I can only hope it will be as nice a time as it was today.

Thursday, Ichthus: Day One.

(Note: There are probably numerous errors - grammatical or otherwise. I'm really tired, and sorry. Try your best to make it through. Thanks for reading).

3 PM - Family Force Five: They actually weren't that bad. I had heard they had a really impressive stage show, which is the main reason why I wanted to hit the 'thus earlier to see them. They were about what I expected - a little weird but nothing amazing. It was a good band to cut my teeth for 2006 on.

4 - 5 PM: Nothing too much exciting. Caught a couple tracks from a couple bands (Day of Fire, Last Tuesday) and walked around the grounds a bit. Checked out the merch tent, the youth leader tent, etc.


5 PM - Staple: Probably the best and most enjoyable show of the entire day/night. It was the first time I had caught an entire act by them, and since they are breaking up this summer, the last time I will see them (how appropriate). My friend Joe loves the band, so it was nice he got to check them out one last time. Plus, Darin (the lead singer) pushed the mic in both Joe and my faces during one of the songs - so we have both officially sung Staple songs with them, and performed at Ichthus. Awesome.

6 PM - 8 PMish: Main stage stuff. David Crowder went on (and since I have seen him numerous times, I was not terribly impressed or excited. He's great, but I was really tired and hot at this point (not burnt, thank God for sunscreen). The keynote address was AWESOME. I was amazed that I could come to the festival purely for the music (as I did last year) - but God could use my lack of energy, down time, and quietness to speak to me and convict me of some major things in my life. It was great to hear about being slave even with the freedom of Christ offered and working in your life. The big things I took away from the message was to: 1) focus more on my identity in Christ and measure all of my wants and actions based around that character; 2) do the things, focus on the things, be the things that please GOD; and 3) fill myself, and yearn to be filled, with things of the Spirit. After a long time of following my own path and being horribly selfish, plus a day filled with a fair amount of pride, selfishness, and sin (yes, even at Ichthus)...it was nice to hear the voice of God.

8 PM - Jeremy Camp: Although I did not stay for his whole show, it was nice to finally get to see him live. It also actually turned out to be a very nice time to praise God and just experience him again, in music - right after a great keynote.

9PMish - Kids in the Way: This marked the end of my evening and was another amazing performance. This was the first time I had seen them live and I had been waiting about a year for it. They put on a short, but great, set. Yet another band I was happy to see very bold about their faith.

And that's about it. I'll try to be back tomorrow evening to talk about Friday. It's going to be a much longer day for me (about 10 AM - Midnight) so it might not happen. But, I at least wanted to post something...and I figured a summary of the Ichthus days would work well.

HEY - if anyone that reads this is going to be there tomorrow (and happened to have access to the internet this evening I guess) call my cell phone and we'll meet up somewhere! See you then.

How To Save A Life.

(Or, How Taking Crappy Pictures of Railroad Signs Can Lead to Someone's Ultimate Salvation).

This is how I see it:

I take my camera and I head out for the day. I take a few hundred pictures. Maybe one or two of them look decent at all. I open Photoshop - edit them, crop them, whatever. I upload them to Flickr. A bunch of people come by and check them out. Some leave comments, others add me to their contacts list. Three things can happen from here...

One - that person comes across this blog. They read up a bit. For some strange reason they become intrigued. They continue reading. Eventually I get around to talking about Jesus and how absolutely amazing He is. That sets off a spark that eventually just burns in that person until they can't help it - the love of Christ just wears them down and builds them back better than ever.

Two - that person gets in touch with me somehow. MySpace. Email. Real life. No idea. We start talking. We continue to talk for a while because God knows I can go on forever. Eventually I get around to talking about Jesus and how absolutely amazing He is. A spark. A fire. A newfound passion erupts in this person.

Three - that person could care less about my pictures. They don't even hit MySpace. This blog has no visitors ever again. I stop writing. But I keep taking pictures. Eventually, I print them out. I frame them. I barter a deal with some guy who owns a coffee shop and he hangs them on the wall. Someone sees them. They get in contact with me (because they like them...I promise). We start talking. They're interested in a story (people like stories). Eventually I get around to talking about Jesus and how absolutely amazing He is. Something starts and it doesn't stop.

All three of these scenarios have little to do with me. Or my pictures. Or my very existence. They'd happen without me, they happen everyday despite me. Thank God, every now and then - I get a chance to be a part of it.

(And, just in case it is unclear - this invitation is open to all. You can share your faith with anyone, at anytime, anywhere, for any reason. You don't have to have a certain occupation. The bounds of expressing joy in Christ and awe of His beauty are without.)

A Cross, Not A Plaque.

First off, this post should not be construed to be an argument for or against legalism. It has nothing to do with that at all (as far as I know).

On my way home this evening I was listening to the album Fight the Tide by Sanctus Real - and in one of their songs the lead singer makes a point about the ten commandments. Since this is an older song, I imagine he was speaking about the controversy of having the commandments displayed in buildings (this debate was all the rage a while back).

Being a man of deep thought - I started to think about the act of displaying the commandments. And then, in all fairness, I started to think about other peoples/religions/beliefs hanging their own set of rules, or whatever, in the buildings as well. It started to get a bit ridiculous in my head (pettiness, arguments, biterness, etc.) so I tried to make it a bit simpler.

As a Christian, I obviously have a message to get across to people. I have some sort of agenda. Some goal. What is the absolute best way, on a public stage, to express the most important aspect of my faith and beliefs?

How about instead of a plaque with writing that most people won't understand we shake things up and mount a cross on the wall?

Bear with me.

What does the Law represent to the world? Rules...regulations...guilt...10 bothersome exercises. How about us (Christians)? Impossible standards...failure...guilt...10 bothersome exercises.

The world does not need an outline. A guideline. Another set of do's and dont's (no matter how important, valid, and powerful they may be). The world needs a savior.

We talk about putting our best foot forward. Being lights to the world. Witnessing about the glory of Christ. Showing people the way home.

Why don't we exalt the cross?

It's Been A While.

Apologies for the lack of updates (for those still actually coming by here regularly) - I've been a bit busy with life lately. Work has been absolutely amazing - I love my job...I just wish I was able to do more around here to be a better worker. Hopefully, with time, as things become more familiar I'll be worthy of the call. It tends to work a bit differently in IT...the measure of success...but I'm working towards it - trying to stay busy, trying to learn, and most importantly, trying to serve every chance I get.

Outside of work, life has also been grand. Life groups in high school ministry are over for the summer, so I have a bit of a break there (not that my guys are horrible, but it is nice). The past couple of weeks I have been "taking off" from the normal extracurricular activities at church (other than main worship/service on the weekends). It has been nice to get home a bit earlier and to be around the family - and also to get home to clean up around my room, etc.

As anyone who's been here recently can tell, I've been taking a lot more pictures. I borrowed my dad's DSLR and have been absolutely loving it. Plus, God has just given us such amazing days here recently for the summer - so it's been great to get outside and enjoy it.

Plans for the summer? I don't necessarily get a break anymore - but I have two weddings (friends') coming up, Icththus, a July 4th trip to Cincinnati (hopefully) and a few other things I am sure to keep busy with. I'm hoping to get a new bike so I can start to do some riding, and I have really been enjoying the time I get outside to go for walks. There's a couple bands coming close that I really want to see - so hopefully a show or two will be in store. Other than that, work, relax, spend time with family and friends - the usual.

I would love to promise future updates on a regular basis (life related, and my normal thoughts that I tend to ramble about on here) - but I cannot guarantee anything (I'll try, but no guarantees). As always - if you know me, or even if you don't - you can always e-mail me.

Until next time.

New Shots.

EDIT: 20 new shots! Go to my Flickr and check them out now! There are 18 on the first page, the final two on page 2. Thank you SO much for your comments - there have been many kind words sent my way. I love taking the pictures myself - but your love/like of them makes it all the better. Thanks again!

Hello all. Apologies for the lack of updates - I've been a bit busy these past couple of days.

Anyway - there are new pictures up over at my Flickr photo page. I would greatly appreciate any and all of you heading over there to check them out. The first ten, on the main page, are the recent additions. Please leave comments if you have good advice, and definitely leave comments if you like something.

Also - you might want to bookmark the page...I'm playing around with a new camera and, if possible, will be trying to put new pictures up in a more timely fashion.

Thanks!

What Happened To Selflessness?

I just wanted to take a quick moment to apologize to you all for my seeming lack of caring lately. I've been amazingly selfish here recently, and in the past - and while I cannot say for certain when it might end - I can promise that God is shining a light on it, showing me the damaging results of it, and working on it for the good. So all of you, in this cyber-land - my deepest apologies. Hopefully I'll also have a chance to send my apologies to the people a bit closer than the Internet. My gratitude for your almost limitless patience.

Thank You For Disappointment.

I know, it sounds ridiculous. Disappointment, being let down, not particularly getting what you want - they are all bad things. They are frustrating, disheartening.

Liberating.

You see - we often have things in our lives that we want. Things we set our eyes, our minds, our hearts, and our appetites for. They become our passion. They become our prayer.

Many times, these things are not honoring to God. Sometimes, in their best form, they merely cut short of what they should be - they are a shadow of the greatness demanded...our nature, or our pursuit, has left it something it should not be (even if it was good, or not necessarily bad, to begin with).

I think disappointment serves a noble purpose in these situations. We are running as fast as we can to reach that goal, we are fighting hard to win the prize - and it becomes a blinder to our eyes without us even knowing. Were it not for the loss, temporary or perpetual, we might have never been restored to a more faithful, firmer, understanding position.

So, thank God for the disappointments in this life - and the absolute grace to realize them for what they are - purposeful redirections towards an ultimately greater treasure.

To Be Like God.

God is the most joyous being in the entire universe.

We are (I am) lonely, depressed, saddened, self-pitying.

This tears at my insides. Our sadness is so infecting, so manipulating. It consumes us, will not let us go, penetrates to the very depths of the soul. Our moods can change on a whim, our emotions can be confused, our thoughts can be taken captive. We are restless. We are without peace.

Why? What has gone horribly wrong with us? (And I am not seeking a cliché answer).

It's such a horrible conflict. We see the glory of God in the face of Christ - and we have hope, we have joy, we have a Spirit of grace and love.

But we are still broken. Still confused. Still seeking with such persistence and power those things that battle against us, that wage war against God - that pull us deeper into a murky abyss that is not without strength to hold us down.

I know so many cries go to our God. He is beyond time, but I know that time is filled with the aching of our hearts - directly to His ears. His compassion floods over us, and it lasts for a time but then we are back again...wallowing, paralyzed, affected.

Lord have mercy on us in our dark days, in our dark nights. Help us to see the absolute temporary nature of our current state. Help us to again witness the glorious light of your presence in our lives. Leverage your strength and your power for our benefit - because you care for us, because you love us. Lead us away from these things...lead us closer to you. Never let us go, never let us go.

Renewed, Restored.

So, I was thinking about Adam and Eve this morning on my way back from Triangle Park and the Global Night Commute (which was great, and I'll try to touch on that later this week).

A close friend and I had been talking about Genesis and something that came up we had never really taken notice to before. Starting with chapter 2, in the creation account of man specifically, we see multiple occasions where God is referred as LORD God. When Satan comes along (Genesis 3) we see that he takes away the LORD part: "Did God actually say..." (Gen. 3:1)

The Lordship of God is an amazing and important thing - and here we see a deception that strikes against the very person of God. Yes, it is easy to think of there being some being greater than us that could have created the earth. Some of us even get to the point where we realize we need a Savior - someone with immeasurable strength to move us from death to life. It's even easier than all these to seek a Friend.

But where has the Lordship of God gone in our lives? When we chose deception and lies in our own lives, I think God gave us over to our own lordship. An inferior, broken one. We were created in His image - and given responsibility and a lesser lordship over the earth. But, our treason affected that and caused damage against our relationship with God and our stance in this world. We have become our own power - and, unfortunately, we have not enough.

So why am I not moaning like I often do here? Because the big thing that hit me today was restoration. Jesus' life wasn't just about going around to heal people, or to speak great words of wisdom. It was something much more.

Another close friend, who I was able to hang out with last night, was telling me that he believes Jesus came to start a following. I agree in part, and would only change it to say that I believe Jesus came to start a family.

Before Christ laid down his life He told his disciples something amazing -

"No longer do I call you servants, for the servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all that I have heard from my Father I have made known to you." (John 15:15, ESV, emphasis mine)

And it only gets better - after the cross, after the resurrection from the dead -

"Then Jesus said to them, 'Do not be afraid; go and tell my brothers to go to Galilee, and there they will see me." (Matthew 28:10, ESV, emphasis mine)

The cross of Christ accomplished a great many things - so many that I cannot go on today (or for long enough) to detail them all. His resurrection from the dead proves His words, that it was finished with His sacrifice, and testifies to all He had spoke before that point.

Jesus has brought us back into communion with God. We now have a heavenly Father. We have a Savior. We have a Friend. But, most importantly, we can again call him our Lord. And under that Lordship His kingdom will reign, and shine, and prosper - and hopefully many will see it and come. The invitation is unconditionally open...

"The Spirit and the Bride say, 'Come.' And let the one who hears say, 'Come.' And let the one who is thirsty come; let the one who desires take the water of life without price." (Revelation 22:17, ESV)

What are we waiting for?

Psalm 77:1

I cry aloud to God, aloud to God, and he will hear me.

He Is Not Here. He Has Risen.

Why look for the living amongst the dead?

Hail! The Risen Christ.

Crown him with many crowns,

The Lamb upon his throne;

Hark, how the heavenly anthem drowns

All music but its own!

Awake, my soul, and sing

Of him who died for thee,

And hail him as thy matchless King

Through all eternity.

Crown him the Son of God,

Before the worlds began,

And ye who tread where he hath trod,

Crown him the Son of man;

Who ev'ry grief hath known

That wrings the human breast,

And takes and bears them for his own,

That all in him may rest.

Crown him the Lord of life,

Who triumphed o'er the grave

And rose victorious in the strife

For those he came to save;

His glories now we sing,

Who died and rose on high,

Who died eternal life to bring,

And lives that death may die.

Crown him the Lord of Heav'n

Enthroned in worlds above,

Crown him the King to whom is giv'n

The wondrous name of love.

Crown him with many crowns,

As thrones before him fall;

Crown him, ye kings, with many crowns,

For he is King of all.

(Crown Him With Many Crowns, Words: Matthew Bridges (1800-1894), 1852)

Got A Sleeping Bag?

Then it might be worth your time to support something that can, hopefully, bring light to a terrible situation taking place in our world today: a nation where thousands of children must flee en masse to cities to prevent their capture - one that would lead to their usage as soldiers in a long-running war...a war that is being ignored by too many.

Click the picture below to be taken to the page where you can find much more information than I can provide - including information about becoming a participant in Global Night Commute. If you live in/sign up for my town, I'll see you there.

A Request.

To all my Christian brothers and sisters who read this blog, I ask that you visit the site below - Voice of the Martyrs - and sign up. You will be able to go through the entire site and see all the content, you'll receive their newsletter by mail, and you will also receive a weekly news and prayer update (all free). It has been very valuable in my life to be constantly reminded of the faith of believers who as Paul said in the Bible "...are being killed all the day long; [and] are regarded as sheep to be slaughtered." It has constantly broken my heart, opened my eyes, and worked on my spirit of service.

To those who are not believers - I would recommend the site as well. If nothing else, it might show you a side of Christianity you've never seen before: people who God has called and empowered in His grace to go and possibly die to show the love of Christ. These people believe in a God that loves and longs for every person to know Him. Maybe their stories will inspire you to a search for this God.

Voice of the Martyrs

The Wisdom Of Christ.

It continues to amaze me (in a wonderful way) how truth and relevancy is found in the Bible. Some might disagree, but I believe in absolute, universal truth. There is a source of all that is good, all that is right, and all that is true. That truth may sometimes be difficult to understand, even more difficult to grasp, relate, and submit to - but it exists. I continue to find that truth every time I take time to open the Word of God. I have faith, and have seen in my own life, that on a broad scope, and even in specific situations - the truth and the wisdom of Christ shines brightly off the pages and into my heart, mind, and soul.

Yet this is much more important, and much bigger, than what some consider just a book. The reason why the Bible is so valuable, why it is so packed full of truth and relevance is because it testifies about someone. You could say that the words on that page are merely a mirror that reflects the amazing qualities of an amazing being.

That being is Jesus Christ.

Every word of Scripture is not meant to be reduced to rules and regulations, stories and poems and genealogies. The impact of the Bible is to introduce people to a magnificent, holy, living God. The end-all is not that people would stop doing something, or start doing something, or know this, or know that. The finality is that a person would come face-to-face with Jesus Christ - the savior of the world, the creator of the universe, the lover of our souls.

And that is why I weep at the current state of this world. It is fallen and broken and nasty and painful. There are more people than I can even fathom who are suffering unthinkable things. But the tragedy in all of this is not that they are losing on a scale of how comfortable and wonderful life can be, it's that every day that passes they are losing out on the chance to know God.

To know healing. To know love. To know acceptance. To know mercy. To know sufficiency. To know beauty. To know kindness. To know truth. To know purpose.

Again - to know Jesus.

And so it burns in my heart (because I am so awful at fulfilling this quest) to show people this amazing God that I have been blessed to find. Not because I am right. Not because I am holier than they are. Not because I am stronger, or smarter, or better. But because they absolutely need to meet this God.

Robbie Seay Band, "Come Ye Sinners":

Come ye sinners - the poor and needy
Weak and wounded - sick and sore
And Jesus ready stands to save you
Full of pity, love and power

I will arise and go to Jesus
He will embrace me in His arms
And in the arms of my dear Savior
Oh, there are ten thousand charms

Or, as the One I feel honored and blessed to know once said (and still says):

"Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest." (Matthew 11:28, ESV)

"And I tell you, ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and the one who seeks finds, and to the one who knocks it will be opened." (Luke 11:9-10, ESV)

Let us spend every day asking, seeking, and knocking - in the great hope that our merciful, loving, compassionate, awesome God would bless us with receiving, finding, and opening.

So, Yeah...

...it's 4:30 in the morning and I can't sleep. I was absolutely exhausted when I got back from church this evening (which was an amazing service, by the way). After I got home, I ended up taking a quick walk down the road, but my dad's warnings of crazy people lurking in the darkness certainly worked to hasten my return. There was nothing good on television, and the internet just isn't doing it for me lately, so I laid down - took maybe a 30-minute nap - and was back up because of hunger and hail (a quick downpour, pretty small stuff, but it woke me up nonetheless).

Now - about 4 or so hours later - I'm still up. I turned on the stereo a while back and went through some old mix CDs I had in there. A lot of nostalgia...made me a bit giddy. I rummaged through my dad's CDs a couple minutes ago and found a bunch I like (that used to be mine before I decided to sell almost all my CDs to him). Dave Matthews Band, Crash, is currently in the discman.

I think I'm excited about plans tonight. It's our weekly meeting to hit up Common Grounds for coffee and open-mic night, and my friend has been out of town for the whole weekend...so it should be really great. There are also other reasons why I think the blood is pumping quicker and the mind is racing - but we'll leave those out for right now (nothing bad, I promise).

Anyway - everyone should go out and buy "Better Days" by Robbie Seay Band. I was listening to it this evening on the way home from church and it is absolutely amazing. Really unique sound, awesome lyrics, great for fun or just a nice, moody evening. It is totally multi-faceted. If you do pick it up, check out songs 7 and 8 - those happen to be my favorites of the moment.

So what's up with everyone out there? I'm pretty sure someone comes by here, at least occasionally, because the site tracker logs show unique visitors - and it doesn't count me. Send a comment my way and let me know how things have been, what's going on in your life, what I can pray for, what I can celebrate with you for...all that good stuff.

And I think I'm out. Probably not to sleep. More Dave Matthews I imagine.

God Is Good.

I long for a love with Christ that centers on His glory and beauty and majesty - surviving the threats and tribulations of this world without diminishing. It is so much easier for us to praise God and thank Him for His amazing blessings when things are going good, I admit.

But this past week has been absolutely amazing in SO many ways. So, I am thanking God now for His amazing blessings these past few days. Praying for it to continue, resting hard in the promise that He will still be who He is if it does not.

He has been working on my heart and has met me more than once this week to remind me of faith, love, mercy, and grace. I got to see the cross fresh and new and I wept at the beauty of His love. I feel a wave of holiness and righteousness, in part, moving in my life. I know it is the presence of the Lord that is my good, that is my boast - so I thank Him for that as well.

Seeing old friends. Interviewing for a wonderful position (being considered in the first place was amazing...the outcome lays in God's faithful hands to do what best suits Him). Late nights with an absolutely amazing person who I have grown to care about very much. Learning so many lessons in that time about where God wants to move me and how totally important it is to not only listen to the wonderful truth and advice He has prepared for relationships, but to put Him at the center - and as the highest prize - of any relationship. I've said words and come to conclusions this past week that I never thought I would.

It's finally Spring! The sun is shining and I've got the drive to get outside and enjoy creation. Going for walks, sitting and just marveling at how beautiful it can be.

There's a lot in store for the future - I see. Some of it seems like it may be difficult - to adjust and trust God with situations that I tend to be impulsive about. However, I am amazed by the hope I have that God is working this for my good, that something I have longed for might come to fruition.

And if it doesn't - I just pray for the grace of God to proclaim how Good He truly is.